Three Men On a Boat

Tuesday, September 30, 2008

zimbabwean supermarket economics

So there is the new twebty thousand note and let's not forget the ten thousand note printed on a 1000 note paper. But that is that... 

So you see before the increase in the daily withdrawls limit cash was king yeah? You could get something for 4,000 cash and if you swiped then it would cost you about a million. Now cause certain places such as Bon Marche in Chispite wanted your cash their machines were always offline. And bvy that I mean always, except for their special customers.

Suddenly in the last couple of days their machines have started working again and guess what. They don't want your cash. You get there and you want to pay cash for something and they say no thanks we're only swiping today.  Like what the truck?

You get the feeling and quite really so that the commoner is being swindled... And meanwhile the Prime Minister says everything will be fine sooner than you think.

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:30 AM 0 comments

Monday, September 29, 2008

Of Chiyangwa and the Bentley

Saturday evening it was at Fife Ave shops. Big Phil drove up and stopped just in front of Spar in the car park. The lot selling milk, airtime recharge cards, meat, bread and whatever else was available out there screamed with excitement.

Then Big Phil in his typical style had the top come over the convertible before driving off in his usual aplomb to the delight of the crowd. Of course the commoners were screaming his name and he was loving it. 

Now I have no idea what type of car it was save for the fact that it was a Bentley. It is also highly unlikely that if I were to see it again I would know it. Well it was rather good to look at though.

Astounding how much attention it got. People pulling out phones to take pictures and the sort. It showed that people generally have no lives. What that means is we are so caught up in what someone else is doing we forget that we need to be involved in being ourselves. It is rather terrifying when you give it some thought cause then originality goes out the window doesnt it?

It means essentially we're all xeroxing someone all the time....

What the...

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 12:48 PM 0 comments

Thursday, September 25, 2008

McCain's dogs bollocks and Mugabe still hates the British and the Americans

So this Thursday Sen John McCain came out saying that there was need for the parties to suspend presidential campaign and focus on the economy. This was pretty rich coming from someone who said that there was nothing to worry about and that the fundamentals were still fine and there was no need to panic over the economy.

With less than forty days till America makes a decision that could decide the future of their country Mr McCain wants to take the eye off the ball.It seems rather convenient that with the polls favouring Sen Barack Obama as they are now as the public start blaming the republicans for the mess they are in now. Looks like the great democracy of the world just got interesting

***

Meanwhile Zimbabwe's president Robert Mugabe(Bobby to his mates) has had another go at the British and the Americans saying that they need to remove the evil sanctions. It was the usual story but what was interesting was that he said there was no stumbling block to the deal between him and Morgan Tsvangirai.

Now with Cde Thabo free to really knuckle down and work on the Zimbabwe deal after he is officially relieved from his duty as President of Mzansi today, that should mean that things will move a bit faster. Well at least according to one source as his availability will not be based on other issues out there.

Just wondering what the thuggery happening in South Africa will mean for Southern Africa though

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Monday, September 22, 2008

Life After Cde Mbeki

The world or part of it watched as Cde Thabo spoke last night and bade farewell to the hot seat that is the presidency of the schizophrenic country called Zimbabwe.

Just a few weeks back they were calling for Zuma's head and then suddenly their knives were pointed at our dear comrade.  Dear Cde Thabo who stood so resolutely with such grace only found in the school of a certain Robert Mugabe(no pun intended) and delivered his last address to the nation. He connected because he was emotional about leaving and suddenly Helen Zille and friends who had been calling for his resignation were championing his human rights cause. How pathetic

He did well enough and South Africa will not necessarily go down the drain without him. But he did say that if he had not quit it would have caused bloodshed. That is a striking comment of some proportion really. Bloodshed? Is it that close.

It raises questions about the divisions within the ANC? Did he jump before the ship started sinking? What is the fallout going to be from this because this is not the end of it all.

Has Cde Thabo just booked his ticket to Zimbabwe to stay for a while?

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 1:23 PM 0 comments

Sunday, September 21, 2008

But why Cde Thabo

So yesterday the bombshell was dropped. Our dear comrade Thabo Mbeki will be leaving office soon and he will give a press conference today or something. 

I did rather like him so it is what it is? Yes the next president of South Africa is an idiot and should be shot for the sake of the nation but in reality there are ways of doing these things. Yes we can manipulate the system but we use technicalities. that is the new way. You should have started visiting Bobby Mugz from up north a lot earlier to get tips mate.

I am worried for SA because well what happens now? Mind you the ANC should be even more worried because the number of disgruntled South Africans from this fallout is significant especially given the way Malema and his lot are going.

We will just sit and wait and see what happens... 

But Cde Thabo. If life becomes odd there you are free to come back to Zimbabwe!

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 1:58 PM 0 comments

Thursday, September 18, 2008

The odd Zimbabwe cellphone tariffs

So if you tried to make a call from your phone today and you had less than 250 dollars then you would have found the nice lady would have told you that you did not have sufficient credit to make that call. You see... yesterday from that you could make about twenty calls and today it is just one.

Now one could say that the reason why is because tariffs were to cheap here and all that drab and sure they were which led to the congestion on the network. 

But then 250 dollars which is about 60 cents in US Dollars at today's rate is a big ask. That comes to about 4 rands and yet across the border the same call costs about 86 cents in Rands. N

The argument will be that at transfer rate it is still dirt cheap but most people using phones are buying airtime off the street for cash. Given that Gideon Gono is giving out 1000 dollars from the bank per day then what you are getting is an anomally. That 1000 will allow you four minutes. However given that your transport costs are about 400 dollars  one way then you hav a problem.

Unless you sell buns or something on the side it doesn't make any sense. 

But then again this could be a speculative price. Speculative like just about everything in Zimbabwe.

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:21 AM 0 comments

dodging bullets in a world with no guns

You see one of the biggest problems we have in the world right now(gosh I love that expression) is the unavailabilty of human beings in the realms of power. Well how does that work. Shoot the bastard and he will die won't he?

Not exactly. We have a class of superfine individuals who have been created from some sort of cultural or social misnomer or something. I have no idea what it is but suddenly it is improper to be human. When one has etiquette he is considered completely stupid if not more than that. Then if you are kind then you are weak.

Yet the reason why we are here at all is because of the continual kindness of people that  we have come across. Our mother didn't flush us down the toilet, the midwife pitched up for work, the doctor paid attention... and that is just the beginning. 

We then after misseducation are driven by commonplace ambition to believiing that morality and human inclination are daft. How does that work?

Or does it even begin to work at all?

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:21 AM 0 comments

Wednesday, September 17, 2008

the hand of titus holding the Zimbabwean shovel

Now every so often I am going to put a random title up for people to get lost a bit. It's like me writing this blog for real interest and less  about pastoral, populist stuff. Screaming headlines like deal done or maybe even, well the Lehman brothers thing. But that was a bit silly. One hundred and fifty eight years and somehow you manage to mess it up. Mind you having George Bush as president didn't help and he has to be worse than Robert Mugabe. Mind you I am not sure that ol' Bobby is that bad to be honest. 

So it is three days since the signing of the agreement between the three parties in Zimbabwe and well we still wait for news on the make-up of cabinet. It should be interesting and there have been some ambitious documents that have been mischievously passed around. It should be interesting i tell you.

What we can say is that there is cautious optimism in the air and people are ready for something to happen. The prime minister says he can rally support from the international community and that we won't be kicking and screaming soon. I think it is down to whether these two blokes can work together and how long it will be before Arthur Mutambara runs for prime minister...

Now if you're waiting for what the thing with the title meant something more. That titus was some clever thing going on... you're right. I just don't remember it too well right now.

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 12:25 PM 0 comments

Tuesday, September 16, 2008

Copy of Agreement Signed between Mugabe, Tsvangirai and Mutmabara

It is available as a pdf from the link below

The deal-full text.pdf

It is an interesting document and to be frank I think a lot of people don't know what they have. I say Mugabe has not let go of an inch of power

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 3:36 PM 0 comments

Monday, September 15, 2008

History is made in Harare

Thousands were outside and trying to break in to watch history. Others had their radios on and TVs for reference and a collective sigh of relief was heaved across the continent. The day has come for Africa to really do more than lay claim to the fact that she wields power.

The three principals gave three very different speeches. Two were populist and the other was from a statesman. All three were appropriate and addressed the broad issues. But they caused quiet optimism.

Now the real work starts and Zimbabwe rolls its sleeves up and finds a solution.

It will mean that understanding of the deal must be made more apparent to the people because they have to run with it. And the policies have to made clear. The new way needs to be very clear or else speculation will this deal in the water.

I am sure that there is a good section of both sides that is not happy with this deal but this is the best chance Zimbabwe has at getting something going. Because the visions are linked. It is after all one Zimbabwe and it needs to go beyond the populist rhetoric to being about the country.

I have to say that Mutambara has done rather well for himself given the fact that he was a nobody in the political circles just a minute ago. But alas he walks in the corridors of power now. Wonder where he is going to next...

New Zimbabwe? Nah. Just Zimbabwe rebranded!

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Zimbabwe deal update 11 - Mbeki closing remarks

Mbeki reads from the agreement outlining the commitment that comes from the parties

Deal to be made available for download later on this site

Pays tribute to the leaders of Zimbabwe for the deal that has been made.

Says some outstanding work that is left. Negotiations over constitution inclusive government still ongoing. Have not been concluded yet. But says they will be done as soon as possible.

Zimbabwe needs solid support for it to develop.

Says region and continent will help to develop Zimbabwe

Has confidence that the work that starts now will succeed

Closes proceedings

Photos and lunch

Commentary to follow soon

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 1:17 PM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 10 - Kikwete Remarks

In his capacity as the AU chairman

Congratulates all on the signing of the document and says it is the beginning of a new era.

Keeps saluting the parties.

Saluites Mugabe - willingness to negotiate

Salutes statesmanship and patriotism of MDC

Salutes Mutambara for providing balance.

Salutes Mbeki for what he has done. Says history will applaud his service.

Says success of Zimbabwe is Africa's success

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Zimbabwe deal update 9 - King Mswati closing remarks

Calls the deal a victory for Africa

Congratulates Africa on decision

Says sanctions should be lifted and all financial assistance must be availed

long live Zimbabwe and Africa is the end of his speeech

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 12:49 PM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 8 - Mugabe remarks

Acknowledges Mbeki as the heroic facilitators

Calls Tsvangirai and Mutambara partners

Calls it a re-enactment of togetherness

Makes reference to liberation struggle. Makes reference to frontline state movement.

Says the problem of your brother is also your problem. Applauds contribution of other African countries to Zimbabwean liberation

Says the African brothers and sisters have helped once again.

Says African problems must be solved by Africans.

Puts blame squarely on British for interference. Recieves some applause.

Receives big applause on land.

Chides British for interference on land redistribution.

Says salient principles must be continually be observed if unity is to succeed - Zimbabwe is a sovereign state and only Zimbabweans should govern it.

with a right to self-determination.

Also as part of Africa Zimbabwe will cooperate within certain frameworks. Will cooperate with those kind to us.

Applauds persistence and intellect of Thabo Mbeki

Tells the story of reaching conclusion. Says deals seemed dead after Tsvangirai had refused deal initially. And then after suggestions from Mbeki again they reached agreement.

In reference to deal:

Says things in the agreement that both don't really like but found a way to work.

Says they have to walk to the same route and the same way.

Says they have been walking the same route without knowing it. Failing to recognise each other. Says history forces us to walk to the same route.

Says he would never attack an African brother in public in reference to Ian Khama; Says Ian Khama is a close friend if not a relative.

Seretse Khama was the only heads of state to attend independence (?)

Wants strong ties between Zimbabwe and Botswana. Says whatever happened is history

Says problems do occur but we must have solutions as Africans.

Says ZANU PF is commited to the deal. Says readiness to work and provide experience where it can be provided.

Calls for explanation of new way to all people.

Zimbabweans belong to each other.

Calls for observence of constitution

Says history must judge favourably

Says all should be committed.

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:59 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 7 - Tsvangirai remarks

receives applause after referring to Mugabe as his excellency President Robert Gabriel Mugabe.

Thanks people who have worked to get this far. Salutes Mbeki.

thanks late Levy Mwanawasa for work and says this will be part of his legacy.

Recognises Ban ki Moon

applauds all members of parliament. calls them a model for the executive branch

thanks for the people Zimbabwe for adhering to peaceful transformation

Salutes them all.

Says parties can work together.

Says people are bound by the same patriotic duty and destiny. He no longer has opponents.

Says belief in people runs deeper than his scars

Hope for the future is greater than his suffering

Join in the rebirth of the country.

Remember all sacrifices that have been made.

looking back provides energy to move forward.

Deserve to stand tall and be excited about what we can achieve

Product of painful compromise and provides no instant cure for ills in society

partners cannot provide the solution alone. will create environment for resurrection of Zimbabwe

new inclusive government must provide a new way of government.

As prime minister designate asks for unity from both parties.

Division and polarisation belong to the past.

Calls for support of the international community.

Calls ZANU PF the mother of all liberation and founding party of Zimbabwe. Calls it the leader of all parties in Africa.

Calls MDC the party of the people

1 - stop food shortages. unlock food accessibility.
2 - need doctors and teachers and businesses to come back. utilities etc
3 - needs security for the people

Success depends on the commitment of the people in general as agents for change

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:42 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 6 - Mutambara remarks

Ian Khama of Botswana receives huge applause after introduction

Mutambara is introduced by Mbeki

Calls the deal a compromise document

Calls it the best short-term measure to get the country out of its situation

A result produced by Zimbabweans working togetehr as Zimbabweans under guidance of african brothers

Calls it a victory for Zimbabweans and Africans

More bringing together than keeping us apart.

the hard work starts

Country going through humanitarian crisis of huge proportions. Docuiment creates framework fro resolution of crisis.

Lists challenges:

1- Protagonists, polarisation within countries
2- Government in waiting to make painful and courageous decisions to drive this country forward. Three partners need to make these decisions.
3- Country has gone through trauma and needs healing

Says the division into opposition parties is a thing of the past as they work as a coalition.

As move is made forward minds should be made on elements of optimism.

Not happy to be stuck with recovery and stabilisation. But making Zimbabwe a power house. Going up the global value chain.

Not interested in aid but in investment.

Mistakenly refers to Tsvangirai as president. Maybe reference to parties(?)

Lauds them to work for the delievry on promises to made to people

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:26 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 4 - Deal Signed!

It is now official. The deal has been signed.

the new Zimbabwe is here

Leaders pose for photographs and exchange handshakes and agreements

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:22 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 4 - annoying poet

Poetry, typical African poetry praising African leaders over the agreement. Populist stuff. Nothing special.

good idea but not very well done. Bless him!

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:12 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 3 - Thabo Mbeki introductions

Thabo Mbeki thanks the negotiators for their work and introduces the three principals by their ew titles.

Mugabe, president
Tsvangirai, prime minister
Mutambara, 1st deputy prime minister

The introduction of Tsvangirai is greeted with huge applause.

Thabo Mbeki csays the signing can now take place

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:07 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 2 - King Mswati remarks

The chairman on SADC Organ Troika on Politics, Defence and Security Co-ordinationon King Mswati of Swaxilandmakes aplogies
Applauds the Zimbabwean people, President Thabo Mbeki and the negotiators.

Declares proceedings open and introduces Thabo Mbeki

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 10:59 AM 0 comments

Zimbabwe deal update 1...

Zimbabwe leaders have taken seats.

National anthem has played and is greeted with applause

The historic event starts...

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 10:55 AM 0 comments

Zimbabweans hold their breath as history hands Mugabe, Tsvangirai and Mutambara the golden pen

We are a few moments away from a potentially momentous event in history. History has handed the trhree leaders of the three parties a pen and shown the dotted line. now it is time for them to sign.

We are watching. The leaders have not arrived yet but we will be providing you with updates as and when things take place here on this blog.

Watch this space as history expects...

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 10:41 AM 0 comments

Friday, September 12, 2008

Steve Biko, 31 years on

As we all know the leader of the black consciousness movement died on his cell this very day thirty one years ago. It is regarded by many as being the single most important event in the struggle against apartheid as it put pressure on the regime in place onto the global platform.

Though originally regarded as hostile but Nelson Mandela's ANC right up until the 90s, his status in South African politics has never been called to question.

We are not going to go through his biography which can be found here. However the relevance of black consciousness beyond just the movement is even more imperative now. We live in a time and space where the knowledge of self has been lost somewhere and we no longer are allowed the identity that is the reason we should be who we are.

Steve Bantu Biko was once quoted by the Boston Globe as having said that as a prelude, whites must be made to realise that they are only human, not superior and that blacks must be made to realise that they are only human not inferior.

This consciousness needs to permeate the core of humanity and become the fulcrum of all thought. We are all human and none exists above another.

Quite rightly said that it meant that life needed to be pumped back into the empty shell of the black man who had his identity diluted by years of colonialism as well as strongly entrenched western reasoning. Now that is not to say that all things west are bad but that an African child should be born into a world that understands so little about its relevance is dangerous as it creates a generation lost to itself. It is not good enough to be western and has no place to go to after that. It's a bit of a farce really cause then you here peddlers of the global village suddenly saying that it doesnt really matter.

But it does. The reason why left-wing movements are now the rage of many capitals is because of the whole globalisation move. Humans are losing their humanity and can no longer celebrate their diversity. And this goes beyond being black. We are losing the colour that makes this world come together.

Much of this stands in the face of evil forces that seek to stop it. A lot exists in a world where it is battered and bruised. But with enough exertion the good always wins the day.Merely by describing yourself as black you have started on a road towards emancipation, you have committed yourself to fight against all forces that seek to use your blackness as a stamp that marks you out as a subservient being. - The Definition of Black Consciousness, I Write What I Like, 1978.

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Thursday, September 11, 2008

11/09... a day for Zimbabwe

It is common cause among those who are in the know that it is going to be a special day for Zimbabwe today because the two will sign today. It is said they will sign and the world will change... well maybe not really change but at least Zimbabweans will see the world differently.

Now there is every chance that we could all fall flat on our faces and they could be fighting some more for the next couple of weeks will the billions invade the currency again but then it might not be so... We could be at the new dawn and Zimbabwe could be turning the corner.

I am not one born for skepticism and while this is not suddenly going to mean manna from heaven at least it means that we are running a different race now.

It's going to be expensive for a minute but it will be so while we are fixing it.

You know the truth right?
posted by 3Men On a Boat at 3:07 PM 0 comments

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

Now Tsvangirai jumps on the bandwagon after Mugabe has gone with the horse

So the older of the wise men said a deal was close and the little grumpy fat boy didn't say a thing.

Then the fat boy after the old man said it's happening again, the little fat boy decided it would be nice to parrot what he said and have a big party in Harare on Wednesday since he hadn't been to a party in a while. Mind you it is hard to get to a party these days if the older guy doesn't fancy you much.

So then we hear that they will sign on Wednesday and some SADC troika meeting will then be moved to Harare just for the sake of the party. I knew Thabo was coming to Zim for a party and nothing else. All party of some big really hard wound scheme to boogy me thinks. Of course I am horribly wrong I will be told but let's face it, Presidents can only boogy for real with other prezzies.

Gosh I am writing in weird form today. Must be the prospect of the party!

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 10:27 AM 0 comments

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

Mugabe says fine, Chamisa says almost fine and Mutambara says aluta continua

So Thabo is in town on holiday again and while he is at it he hopes to get the three not-so wise men from the north to like each other a bit more. Because if they don't like each other then that little thing that is supposed to be delivered and placed in the manger down south otherwise known to most as the soccer world cup of 2010 might just not pitch up.

Of course I think regardless of whethere there is a deal or not the world cup will be here but it will do ver well for Thabz's CV if he has GNU deal up north as a notch in his belt. And he has worked hard for it hasn't he?

The old man, the wisest of the lot from the north says good progress has been made. The fat one didn't want to say anything so he got one of his stooges to say there was some progress and Tuesday might be a nice day for photo opportunities. Then the computer nerd was like, well the struggle continues.

I think the opportunity was lost. It will happen but it won't be the same.

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posted by 3Men On a Boat at 9:39 AM 0 comments

Monday, September 8, 2008

pink toenails and soft feathers... freddie and fannie just got hooked up

Now from the first time i heard those two names together I knew something was up and when Hank the US treasure secretary and decided that they would form a form of union under the tutelage of the state then I knew my suspicions were founded.

You see the new face of socialism came into place. This was baiuling out bad business and awarding it space and time. The privatision of profits and as for the losses, let the taxman deal with that.

You see, I would not have had a problem with that if it was helping the poor folks. Also if this was a government taking over administration and then selling the company back when it was back in health but this is straight out of a North Korean handbook. The socialist system that America has been preaching as the evil that begets humanity has set in. And just you wait until Zimbabwe or someone does it and they will be called retrogressive and all other names that can be substituted for barbarians.

That said you have to say that Palin and Obama's statements were at best poor on the matter. 
Makes you wonder if either of them has any answers.

Maybe they will just join the union and throw in some window dressings and Miss Mae might just found out how to use her fannie and Freddie's mac will return. 

What can I say? That was an open shot!

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Friday, September 5, 2008

this time, bring the guns!

So one day he smacks you... and you let it slide

then he punches you and you let it go

Next there is a kick and you still nah

He brings a knife and cuts you across the stomach you still turn away

Until he brings a gun and at that point having taken all that bullshit you decide that you've had enough. 

Then the guns will come and unless they back off, you shoot

Read between the lines...

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Wednesday, September 3, 2008

google's pretty browser coughs to finish line

Everytime that google says something about new technology it's almost like the days when the US Federal Reserve chairman Alan Greenspan would sneeze and the rest of the world would catch a cough.

Remember when we had email that was just 2mb over at hotmail while the blokes at yahoo boasted a whole 4mb(6mb if you were one of the lucky ones). Then suddenly google came in and said forget that, we are offering 1Gb. That was the sort that hotmail and friends were making you pay for and google was offering it to you for free.

Beyond that emails were set out differently and put together with a whole lot of other gizmos. 

Exciting stuff.

This time however it is google that has caught the cold. Someone sneezed a long time ago and google being well-immunised did not catch the cold. They went on for a while trying to fight everyone and then suddenly that cough caught up with them.

Chrome is the new offering from google. It looks slick with its minimal design - very pretty to look at unless you like husky or majored in some sort of art form that honours throwing mud at canvas -  and runs well enough to not be a nuisance. It is almost next generation but it isnt really offering you anything super-bloody-fabulous that the folks at Mozilla have not been giving us. It's not faster than Firefox at loading pages but it is not the drone that Internet Explorer offers.

What I do like is however that when the browser crashes it is not the whole application that crashes but just the tab you were working on. For those of us with dodgy machines which keep crashing after numerous visits to www.you-can-have-all-the=porn-you-like-in-the-world-while-we-load-your-machine-with-viruses.com this comes as a welcome relief of course.

Now I have no doubt that the google fans will catch onto this browser but this browser will ride on its name rather than on real innovation until google pushes something that takes browsers out of a different box.

For now I will stick to my reliable Firefox whole I run my not-so-critical stuff on chrome.

That said I just typed and loaded this blog from chrome...
posted by 3Men On a Boat at 11:11 AM 1 comments